"No, not laser tag...no one gets hurt."

John doesn't want to play laser-tag. He wants to play paintball. Hello, there's totally a paintball place in MB.

Now you may be asking yourself, "But how does God fit in here?" Funny you should ask. If you go to church and can prove it, I think you get a discount on Sundays. Not really that good of a deal. I bet those nerds from Campus Crusade for Christ played here.

So, as I was saying before you interrupted, if anyone is inclined, paintball is hella available. Paintball USA (not to be confused with Paintball Afghanistan®) has several differently-themed courses to play on and a truly top-notch beverage vending machine.

There's "Village":

"Woods":

And my favorite, "Spool" (which looks suspiciously like "Village"):

Paintball Holdharmless & Waiver